Thoughts of a 10 Year Old Girl – “What I Would Change”

One of our families shared with us the writing of a 10 year old girl, whose older sister has bipolar disorder.  We were so moved by this story that we thought we’d share it with you. Image

The first day when my sister went to the hospital, I felt bad for her and I was scared what was going to happen.  And then I started feeling left out.  Sometimes people would give me presents to make me feel better, but it didn’t really help, because they don’t realize that I don’t need presents, I want their attention.

I feel like I don’t get a chance to “stick out” in my life.  Because everyone is busy with my sister’s problems and no one cares about what I have been through.

I’ve been through some horrible scenes like when my sister is screaming at my parents and running away, calling people swear words. My sister puts me down a lot: she calls me names and makes fun of me. When she does this, I feel sad and it makes me feel like she doesn’t care about me.  She’s always focused on what she’s been through but she never realizes what I’ve been through.

Whenever there is a severe meltdown, it scares me a lot.

I wish that I would have a sister that would play with me and not be too busy for me, and that would be nice to me.  I feel lost because I always wanted to have a friend in the house but I do have my two cats.

Living with a sister with a mental illness is hard because other people don’t go through what I go through and I have to get used to it.  It’s hard to live with because sometimes you just can’t take it anymore.  Because you have just had enough and you want all the yelling and loudness to stop. It feels like living with a bully in the house and it feels like they don’t care about you and they only think about themselves and what they have been through and not what me or my parents are going through.

Sometimes at stores when she has a fit, it is really embarrassing and I try to run away.

One day I hope that all the siblings will have a day or a chance to stick up for themselves and be able to get more attention and have a lot of time to have fun with their brother or sister.

If I could change something I would change that my sister would pay more attention to me and let me have more attention than her sometimes.

One response to “Thoughts of a 10 Year Old Girl – “What I Would Change”

  1. NAMI Minnesota has a group called “Kid Shops” where kids who have siblings or parents living with mental illnesses can come together, realize this isn’t thier fault, that they are not alone, learn developmentally appropriate information about mental illnessess, and support each others. Groups are run by adult “peers” with training. Just another community resource that can help families. http://www.namihelps.org

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